JAN: My levels of unfocused anger are making me a sitting duck for petty triggers, microaggressions, fear-fulfilling hallucinations.
JAN: What makes you say that?
JAN: I feel like lashing out at inanimate objects.
JAN: Oh like your husband?
JAN: Ha ya fer example or my pynco-brush or the rock I swallowed wrong or my slaves who cannot waft a frond to save their inanimate lives.
JAN: Did you say petty tigers? On the gizz-issue, I'd purge and start over. Gargle with seawater.
JAN: Ya you know what I think you got to the core. I said triggers. Now I know that my gizzard was the trigger for the anger.
JAN: What if I were a fear-fulfilling hallucination?
JAN: That term does not describe a being but a projection. Don't you think actual hallucinations give themselves away by being so obviously psychedelic? What if they were smarter than that?
JAN: If hallucinations were smarter than that as if they could be smart or dumb at all they would start crossing over into the realm of technology.
JAN: Ya that's why paranoia is so much more dangerous than a hallucination because it's all based on shiv that's real. Ya ick paranoia, ocd, that's what I don't want. So uncomfortable. A poorly-defined melting wall or ridiculous amphibious countenance staring from above those can be useful metaphors.
Trans. by Phyllis (embedded)
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